Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Wanted: Clone

Today was SO crazy and SO exhausting that I was about thirty seconds away from posting this ad on Craigslist today:

A position is open in the House of M for a Mommy Clone. Job responsibilities include cooking, feeding, cleaning, homeschooling, butt wiping, argument mediation, scheduling, bookkeeping, personal assistant duties including (but not limited to) grocery shopping and other errand running, in addition to working a "real fake job" from home 6-8 hours a day 7 days a week for which you will receive occasional outside compensation (the amount of which is unpredictable and will not be disclosed). The Mommy Clone position offers no pay, time off, or health insurance, but you will be allowed to sleep three hours a night* and receive compensation in the form of undying love, hugs, kisses, snuggles, and adoration.

Anyone who is still interested please undergo a psychological exam before applying, 'cause girl you must be crazy.

*Sleep will not necessarily take place "at night", nor will the hours necessarily take place in a row, but is instead an allotted accumulation of sleep hours per 24 hour period.


Melissa aka Equidae said...

lol dont we love being mothers on such days?

Samantha said...

"Real fake job" lol...I don't know why I thought that was funny, other than the fact that people like to talk crap about me because I am a stay at home Mom.

Andrea (ace1028) said...

I love it. This post is the best ad EVER. Perfectly written. I'd apply to help you out, but I need my own clone. ;)

Mama B said...

This is the best ad ever!

I included it in my Sunday Funnies: http://tinyurl.com/yhub64y