Mommy M.I.A.

I've been gone a loooong time. Okay, so it's been like 4 days, but that's a long time for me. Especially when I've been spending my days having gallbladder attacks...that only makes the days longer. Turns out I am now "throwing stones" which is the nice way to say that I am pushing huge gallstones through my teeny-tiny bile duct.

It IS as fun as it sounds!

In between gallbladder attacks I have largely spent my time feeling sorry for myself for having gallbladder attacks. That, and going to the doctor. I had to-my eyes were turning all yellow colored (which I'm told is bad) and my pee was brown (TMI, and also bad appearantly). I finally got into the surgeon and he said that if I don't get my gallbladder out that it's going to damage my liver and then he said something about my pancreas. Turns out those aren't like tonsils or gallbladders or your appendix...you only get one and they can't take it out 'cause you need it. So we have to get me fixed.

When I am not having an attack I personally feel that I could keep the gallbladder forever. I don't like the idea of being cut into tiny pieces (or was that getting four tiny cuts?). I'll just continue on my way living on air and water and avoid being sawed in half, thank you very much.

Then, at least once a day, I have this overwhelming urge to eat something. When I can no longer stand the hunger pains I will reach for something as fat free as possible, but I STILL get an attack. Yesterday an attack was triggered by the 3.5 grams of fat in half a bagel with reduced fat cream cheese. I seriously can't eat ANYTHING!

When I am laying around moaning because of my gallstones/hunger pains I always change my mind about surgery. At that point I don't care if they have to hack me open with a rusty axe as long as it would make the pain go away forever after that and I get to freaking eat something. In the end though, I always feel better and the cycle starts all over again.

Despite my waffling, we have officially scheduled surgery (that doctor guy was pretty insistant) for Tuesday April 15th at 9:45am PST (time zone included for dramatic effect). I am so nervous! The surgeon keeps telling me that gallbladder removal is one of the least complicated surgeries they perform, but I don't really know about that. He seems pretty shifty to me.....but maybe that's just because I keep picturing him in the operating room with a freddy krugar mask and a chainsaw.